At some time or another, you’re bound to feel the pain of a break up, or experience the hurt that comes with loving someone who doesn’t love you back. But, as horrible as this reality sounds, you must always remember that things will be right again.
Breaking up is hard to do
Having someone break up with you feels terrible – we won’t even try to sugar-coat it. You’ll feel rejected, sad, angry and lonely all at the same time. But the truth is, once you’re over the initial stages, things will start looking up. Never, ever, believe that you won’t find someone else because that is plain crazy – you’re amazing!
Cry it out
Give yourself some time to cry it all out. Not a Bella from New Moon amount of time, but a few days. Wallow in your misery – have a real go at being completely an utterly morose. But then, after those few days, promise yourself that you will snap out of it. Put an actual time limit on it and tell your friends so they can call you out on it if you don’t stop.
Cling to your friends like a leech
Hey, they’re all going to go through it! Make a pact with them that, if any of you is dealing with this, you’ll all be there for each other. No one can make you feel better than a bunch of girl friends who can be your shoulder to cry on or who are able to make you laugh when you really don’t feel like it.
Never become desperate and try to convince the guy to take you back. There is nothing sadder – even if you’re convinced he’s Mr. Right and you can’t live without him. If he’s not ‘feeling it’, nothing you do will change his mind – especially not running after him in desperation. It screams psycho chick!
Don’t sit at home alone so you can dwell. Get out of the house and have fun. You deserve it!
If you’re going to go out and try to find a rebound guy, never allow him to believe he is anything but that. The best thing to do when you’ve just been through a break-up is to spend some time alone before entering into the next one, but we know it’s nice to have someone to dance with, watch a movie with and chat to. So dance with, watch movies with and chat with a number of guys – just don’t get serious with them, treat them as friends. And don’t get their hopes up or you’re being unfair. The right guy will find you in time, don’t rush it!
By: Deanne Birkholtz