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Dr Love: I love a 27 year old guy

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Dr Love: I love a 27 year old guy

Q: So I’ve just turned 15 in August and I really like this guy who is 27. He told me he really likes me too. There is just one problem: how do I tell my mom that I am really in love with a 27-year-old-guy? If she found out, she’d kill me. I really want to be with him, so how do I tell my mom, because she might not allow me to date him because of his age?

A: You’re not going to like what I have to say here…I am 100% with your mom on this one. This is a BAD idea. He is way too old for you, and it creeps me out that he is looking to date someone of your age, when he is 27. You must not pursue this, and ideally you need to tell an adult that you are close to that someone of this age is hitting on you. He has been out of school for nine years – why is he hitting on a schoolgirl? There is something not right at all in this situation. I hate to ever say this, because I remember how I used to feel when people said this to me as a teenager, but you will understand exactly how creepy and sinister this is when you are a bit older. Age difference becomes less of an issue the older you get, but when you are still young and learning and developing, a few years is a big deal. Think how much younger the kids two years below you at school seem… Would you consider dating someone even two or three years younger than you at school? Most wouldn’t, because the age gap is significant when you are in your teens. This is not a question of maturity. You can be the most mature person on the planet, and this is still a bad idea. Be really careful as this can only end in heartbreak or real danger for you. Find someone who is closer to your age because you will learn and grow together. You will have much more in common and this will make you more compatible.

If you need help with this or want to discuss it further please contact drlizzie@panorama.co.za for assistance.

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