Q: I am 14 and am always going over to my best friend’s house…or at least I used to. My BFF has an older brother and my mom things I’m off having sex with him when I don’t pick up the phone. She is paranoid, and truth be told, I hardly see her brother, but now my mom doesn’t let me go over to her house at all. How do I explain to my mom that it’s not like that? How do I get her to trust me around boys? It’s hurting our friendship, so please help!
A: An idea is to have your friend over to your house to continue the close friendship, while you work on your relationship with your mom. It sounds like you need to have lots of open conversations with her. Maybe ask if there is anything you have done to lose her trust and if there is any way that she could trust you and what boundaries you need to set to achieve that trust. Ask if the two of you can agree that the friendship is important and talk about how she can support you having close friends. See if you can agree that when you start making decisions about boys, you’ll talk to her. Communication and lots of it is key!